"Finding Yourself?"

dwessell · 05-29-2008, 02:42 PM

I promise I'm not going to link to everything that these guys do, but this one just made me smile. And I bet it will make you smile too.

“Finding Yourself” Is a Crock | The Art of Manliness

Iron_Beard · 05-29-2008, 10:06 PM

The Art of Manliness is a site I hit pretty regularly but I didn't care as much for this article.

I don't disagree that if you actually use the phrase, "finding myself" in a phrase about yourself you are making excuses for not getting on with life. But giving a cookie cutter list of what do do to fix this was kind of shallow and makes me think he's got a 22 year old son-in-law who plays a few more video games than daddy is used to.

He just sounds like a curmudgeon unhappy with the next generation of kids and doesn't remember his own younger years accurately.

If "finding yourself" is occationally trying new things like straight razor shaving to see what directions you should go then that's fine. It is only when "finding yourself" is an excuse for not gettig on with life, no matter which direction you take. I'd preferr to say find a direction and take it until the experience truly sucks, then stick with it for a while to make sure that you haven't just plateaued and it really isn't for you. Then pick a new direction. Like Nike says, "Just do it."

OK. Stepping off my soap box now.

hoglahoo · 05-29-2008, 10:25 PM

Most people discover self-awareness before their 6th birthday. I don't know why someone would be looking for their own self. I'm of the opinion that if someone doesn't know who they are, it's only because they don't understand why they have made their choices in life. I'm not something I can find, I'm something I choose to be.

I wish I could find a good youtube video to express my thoughts on this matter

Creel · 05-30-2008, 01:04 AM

Self help maxims poorly disguised in historical diatribes work as well as diets-both prey on and produce victims…

You will get a whack of infomercial bait evangelically even maniacally stammering about how much they improved, and then they flame out.

Historically, Caligula was pretty average despot as far as cruelty goes amongst the rogues' gallery of first-century emperors. Certainly no more erratic than others in history- consider His Excellency President for life, Conqueror of the British Empire, Field Marshal Idi Amin Dada yada yada.

Not much more nutty than modern leaders if you will bear with me.

Making a horse a Senator? Big deal Canada's longest-serving Prime Minister, Mackenzie King consulted with his dead mother and his pets, both living and dead, on matters of the state!
Yet despite his numerous eccentricities, Mackenzie King was Canada’s longest serving and is largely considered one of Canada's best Prime Ministers.

One should also consider that absolute power corrupts absolutely. Caligula was also surrounded by either sycophants telling him he was akin to a god or people trying to prove that he was all too mortal. It is only paranoia when it is unreasonable. People were constantly trying to kill him and they eventually succeeded. Caligula found himself…on the end of a knife.

hoglahoo · 05-30-2008, 09:11 PM

I'm very happy to report that today, after decades of eye-numbing searches, I finally found myself.

nun2sharp · 06-01-2008, 02:00 PM

I'd love to find myself, that sonof ab@tch owes me money!

jockeys · 06-02-2008, 02:19 PM

wow, I disagree with this guy's rant on so many levels. a few quick points, if I had all day, I could totally spend all day taking his article apart.

1. playing video games isn't bad. I'm not really into it, but I don't have a problem with other people doing it and to preach against it just makes you sound crazy and old, as hoglahoo noted.
2. "What I do think is that anyone who consciously states he is “finding himself” is a tool. I don’t think it’s something you sit down and decide. It just happens." well, so much for being a conscious, responsible self-realized person. I happen to think that being self-actualized is very much a conscious decision and not just something that happens to you. agree to disagree, I guess.
3. encouraging someone to get married and start a family, when they aren't ready for it and don't want it, is about as responsible as going to the happy tablet academy and preaching about the virtues of suicide. not cool.
4. en re marriage, he states that it was beneficial to him. good for him. but it ain't for everyone, and assuming that something works for everyone because it works for you is pretty short-sighted. many people are very happy to be single, and and self-actualized and content. I ain't one of 'em, but then again, I'm not saying that my way is the only way to do it.

seriously, I could write a dozen pages more, but I think my general point has been made. in summary, I will warn you about the evils of people that think that their lifestyle is good and wholesome, and if yours if different, there is something wrong with you. people like that never have a positive effect on society.

hoglahoo · 06-02-2008, 02:31 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by jockeys

wow, I disagree with this guy's rant on so many levels. a few quick points, if I had all day, I could totally spend all day taking his article apart.

1. playing video games isn't bad. I'm not really into it, but I don't have a problem with other people doing it and to preach against it just makes you sound crazy and old, as hoglahoo noted.
2. "What I do think is that anyone who consciously states he is “finding himself” is a tool. I don’t think it’s something you sit down and decide. It just happens." well, so much for being a conscious, responsible self-realized person. I happen to think that being self-actualized is very much a conscious decision and not just something that happens to you. agree to disagree, I guess.
3. encouraging someone to get married and start a family, when they aren't ready for it and don't want it, is about as responsible as going to the happy tablet academy and preaching about the virtues of suicide. not cool.
4. en re marriage, he states that it was beneficial to him. good for him. but it ain't for everyone, and assuming that something works for everyone because it works for you is pretty short-sighted. many people are very happy to be single, and and self-actualized and content. I ain't one of 'em, but then again, I'm not saying that my way is the only way to do it.

seriously, I could write a dozen pages more, but I think my general point has been made. in summary, I will warn you about the evils of people that think that their lifestyle is good and wholesome, and if yours if different, there is something wrong with you. people like that never have a positive effect on society.

To me it seems like the writer of the article is trying to overcome his own personal tendencies that violate the standards laid down by authorities he feared and respected as a child. I think he needs to find himself like I did.

jockeys · 06-02-2008, 02:36 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by hoglahoo

To me it seems like the writer of the article is trying to overcome his own personal tendencies that violate the standards laid down by authorities he feared and respected as a child. I think he needs to find himself like I did.

on the nose. he sort of comes across as a middle aged guy with wife, kids and a mortgage, seething with quiet desperation, trying to validate his own life choices by decrying other lifestyles as "unmanly" and "childish"

but maybe I'm reading him wrong, I dunno. maybe he's perfectly content and trying to be helpful.